Thursday, May 1, 2008

everbody is busy

I get annoyed when people talk about how busy they are. as if everybody else isn’t busy. as if everybody else we know isn’t working multiple jobs and taking care of their families and working on a degree and trying to spend time with people they care about and trying to deal with faith and life and doubts and hopes.

And so I tend to be quiet when people ask me what I’m doing, I think because I’m paranoid of being that guy who always talks about how busy he is. and truth be told, what I’m doing isn’t particularly interesting. it’s just work, and I feel like I’ve got an awful lot of it to do.

It comes in waves, but this week, I’m in the middle of a wave that is totally wiping me out.

And I don’t have time. I just simply don’t have the time. to do the things I really want to do. to do the things I really dream about. and I feel like that’s what everybody says. but damn it all to hell if it isn’t actually true.

And I think that is what frustrates me more than anything.

Yesterday I fell asleep in my car on the side of the road. woke up when a friend sent me a text message. last night I was with some friends, cleaning up after dinner, talking about whatever, and I sat down on a couch at about 9:30pm and immediately fell asleep. I woke up about an hour later, as everybody was leaving, and a friend I will not call chrissy was asking me what was wrong and I didn’t have any idea how to answer. I just gathered my things and left.

I went home, laid in bed, stared at the ceiling, unable to sleep.

9 comments: said...

now I feel (kind of) bad for taking that picture of you while you were asleep on the couch.

Katie said...

what's wrong is that you're getting OLD! You can't stay awake when you sit down, very sad.

brian Prentiss said...

sorry I haven't commented in a while, I've been REALLY busy

Robert said...

Everyone is busy, but not everyone is productive. Saying you are busy is like saying you are too dumb to do all you tasks efficiently.

Jon Black said...

I knew you were tired when you fell asleep at the damnwell's show on Sunday.

Wootton's said...

i'm not busy
i'm a faffer

brett said...

i'd slap you if you came to my house and fell asleep. actually i'd probably cuddle with you first, and then slap you.

Brian T. Murphy said...

tsc - no worries, my friend.

katie - is that it? age = increased sleep need? that can't be right.

brian - yeah. ha.

robert - as usual, you put things as delicately as ever. I don't know how productive I am, either. it's all relative, I think.

jon - oh yeah. forgot about that. man. I really am tired. but to my credit, that's the 2nd time I've fallen asleep at a damnwells show.

wootens - what's a faffer?

brett - I know. I was so ashamed to be falling asleep. but I totally gut my second wind and stayed up till 2:30 that night so you can't hold it against me.

shawn avery said...

i decided this time around to skip the damnwells show and just go to sleep at home. it was pretty cool.